Sunday, June 14, 2009

Been awhile....

  • Sorry I was off of here longer than planned!
  • Found out my parents are fighting again and its physical
  • Would have been better if it had been something my brother did
  • Not sure how it will end as it doesn't seem like something solveable at this point
  • So while I ate well and according to plan when we went out with my parents that night, I came home and drank and binged because I was stressed out over how this will end
  • I am not sure who will end up hurt the worst. Years ago it was always mom
  • They are much older and dad more frail and mom fights back
  • I am worried about them both but trying not to think about it as much as possible
  • Bad eating went Friday night, again Saturday night. I did excellent Sunday and then drank and binged again Monday......did great again Tuesday through Thursday....
  • Friday we got some good news and hubby wanted to celebrate. I kept saying things like, why celebrate by getting fatter, I don't want the scale to go up, I am back on a good roll, etc but he looked very sad.
  • I could have gone and not eaten badly but I ate badly.....
  • Saturday was hard. We had a family get together which was fun and I saw my nieces, sister and brother.
  • There was food galore and some of my very favorites (thanks mom). Mom kept saying oh you don't need to lose any weight. Come on eat stuff today and celebrate and start over Sunday or Monday.
  • I wanted to but I did not. I had taken my own food. I ate half while they ate dinner and half while they ate dessert. I did munch on some of the vegetable tray mom had later while they all decided to eat more of everything.
  • I was feeling so good by Friday about being on track and not constantly thinking about bad food. Now that I ate bad Friday, well its all I can think about......
  • I felt stressed and unsettled today. Partly because of my parents and partly because of my weight/body and wanting to yet not wanting to eat bad......
  • Hopefully I can do well the next few days and be back on track!
  • Also hoping to catch up with all of you sometime on Sunday and catch up on twitter too!
  • I hope all of you are doing well....I know weekends can be harder.

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